It started this morning after a great meeting. I returned my rental car and I had an exceptionally tight time window to catch an earlier flight. The guy checking me in was slow getting me a receipt and I could see a shuttle bus getting ready to leave. I told him I didn’t need the receipt, “Two minutes,” he says, “ Anyway, there was another bus right behind it.” OK. So I get the receipt, and the bus right behind it barely stops and takes off again. So, I missed both of them.
I get on a third shuttle and the driver asks “what airline?”. United. He drops me off. I’m at the wrong terminal. I’m supposed to be at the commuter terminal, not the regular terminal. How stupid of me. “Pick up the red bus,” I’m told, “that’s not really red.” But, it really is.
So, I hurry. There’s no line at security. I might make it. As I get to the counter the agent leaves. She returns. Just closed, sorry. Can I catch the next flight? “Yes,” she says. How tight in LA. “17 minutes,” she says. I’ll give it a shot.
I arrive in LA. I’m at gate 86. I need gate 70B. Not bad. I hurry. The monitors say the flight is boarding. I’m sweating a little, not for worry, but because I sweat.
I arrive at the counter. There are three people waiting on the other side of the closed of ribbon thing. “Any chance?” I ask. I get the look from the devil. Not only am I not getting on this flight…Well, let’s just say she was having a bad day. So begins my four hour wait.
Finally, time to board. I’ve got a great seat. The Clampetts decide it would be great to sit next to me, on both sides. I’m in the exit row. They all decide to extend their legs to see how much room there really is. “Have a mint?” Her arm extends across my face to her friend across the aisle. “Look at this,” her friend says as she leans across me to give her open cell phone to the lady next to me. And the phone goes back. “Look out the window!” as a finger and an arm flash across my face. And on……
Next time, I think I’ll take the bus.